Q: God has brought you through some difficult situations, Carla; tell us a little bit about your life:
Carla: Carrie, my life as a child was far from ideal. Both my parents were heavy drinkers. Any substance abuse leads to abusive behavior. I never knew what to expect. My home life was unstable and neglectful. But I made myself a promise: When I grow up I’m not going to live this way, and I’m not going to treat my children like this. I tell you, Carrie, I wanted to grow up fast. I was in a hurry to leave so that I could be in control and live a better life. Or so I thought.
But the odds were against me. Some statistics say that 55% of children of alcoholics drop out of school. 60% become alcoholics themselves and 80% of all teen suicides occur from alcoholic homes.
At 17 I dropped out of school and moved in with the first young man to pay me serious attention. There I found my life headed down the same path as my parents’.
Q. Why was it that you found yourself in the same situations when you had promised that your life would be different?
Carla: I found myself trapped in a life of drinking and drug abuse. It was the only life I knew. I wasn’t equipped to handle the normal stresses of life any other way, much less to handle the stresses of my dysfunctional life.
My husband at that time wasn’t either. We were both locked in a lifestyle that sets a course repeated from one generation to the next. I was following my parent’s course. Instead of having control, I lost control.
By the time our son was born my husband was in the throes of addiction and I was crumbling fast. He had introduced me to street drugs. I loved him, I believed. I wanted to be with him when he went out partying with his friends so I would play at it. Something in me didn’t like it, but something in me resigned myself to it. It was just our life. And that life was all I knew. But it didn’t feel much like life.
The drug abuse and drinking led to fights, evictions, adulteries, abortion, depression, suicidal thoughts, and hospitalizations. And there in the midst of the chaos I called my life was my little boy who loved me and needed me.
I saw him living my childhood and I remembered that promise: When I grow up I’m not going to live this way and I’m not going to treat my children like this.
I came face to face with the realization that I could not change no matter how many times I promised myself I would.
Q. Your life did change. Would you share with us how that change came about?
Carla: My husband was leaving again. My son and I were moving again. My life had reached a desperately low point when I received a phone call from a childhood friend. She had been searching for some way to contact me. We had not seen each other in years. She had been a close friend and was familiar with my life growing up.
She said she was glad she had found me. She had been praying for me and believed God wanted her to contact me. She shared how she had entrusted her life to Jesus Christ and wanted to tell me about it. And she did. The call was intriguing to me. First of all, it was like a call from the past and second, God wanted her to call me.
She talked for a while telling me how God answers prayer when we are sincere; that He is real and wanted a real relationship with me because He loved me. I thought how much I wanted this to be true. Was He really real? Did I even dare to hope again? We read in the book of Ecclesiastes that where there’s life there’s hope.
She convinced me to visit her church. As the preacher preached I began to sense the brokenness of my life. He began to explain about sin and how it was not doing and being what God wanted.
I was in sin.
He said that there is a penalty for sin, that penalty is death.
Yep, I thought, I’m dying a slow death.
But the death sin brings is not over when we depart this world. It is an eternal death. It is an eternal separation from all that is good; from all that loves; from all that is merciful and gracious. The eternal death from sin is eternal separation from God.
But God in His mercy sent His only son, Jesus, to pay the penalty for my sins. He died on a cross, for me. Then He rose from the dead to bring me new life. He is alive to help me today.
I didn’t have to do anything to earn this gift of new life; I simply had to believe it and place my trust in what Jesus had done from me. He would forgive me and give me strength to turn away from the life I was living and help me live for Him.
I definitely wanted a new life. I couldn’t change on my own. What did I have to lose? So when the preacher asked if anyone wanted to talk with God and receive this free gift of forgiveness, I did.
I asked God to forgive me and I trusted in what Jesus had done for me. I asked Him to come into my life and help me live for Him.
I entrusted my life to Jesus 27 years ago. I’ve had a lot of regrets in my life – a lot of wishes for do-overs that can never take place – but I’ve never once regretted the decision to give my life to Jesus Christ.
The only regret I have is that I didn’t do it sooner.
Q. How was life after your decision to follow Jesus Christ?
Carla: Carrie, my difficult and unstable life didn’t magically change overnight, but something profound changed in me. How could it not? The very God who created the universe, who lovingly fashioned me in my mother’s womb, had breathed a new life into me.
No longer was I bound by old habits and lifestyles, because Christ had set me free. Before I had no choice in the matter. It was the only life I knew. But now He has given me a new nature, His nature, and I can say “NO” to sin and “YES” to God. No longer am I following a downward course on a destructive path, but the Lord has set my feet on an upward path. Even though this new path is rocky at times the Lord is gracious. He gives me strength. The Bible says, “The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of deer, he enables me to go on the heights.”
The young man who paid so much attention to me when I was 17 decided to leave me and our son. We were left to make it on our own, just me, my son, and – oh yes – the Lord! I want to tell you today that the Lord made all the difference. He helped me rise from my defeated circumstances and gave me resolve to leave behind a life of sin and embrace a new life with my son. Jesus gave me strength. Jesus changed my life. I strongly believe because of my trust in Him, Jesus also changed the course of my son’s life.
From the nothingness of my beginnings the Lord has richly blessed me. I’m now married to a good, Christian man. This year marks our 21st anniversary. With our marriage, God has added to my life three stepsons and one stepdaughter, all of whom I love. Between my son and my stepchildren, they have given us seven beautiful grandchildren.
Though the statistical odds were against me, I went to college and earned a BA in Philosophy and Religion. God gave me strength while I worked during the day and studied at night. Through prayer, Bible reading and my understanding of God’s love and mercy I was able to balance life without wanting to escape with alcohol or drugs.
Now my Lord allows me to serve Him by ministering through speaking and writing. He has taken this vessel of dishonor and shame and has changed me into “an instrument for noble purposes made useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work.” Just like the Bible says. It is my absolute joy to serve Him.
Through Jesus Christ, God has transformed my empty, unstable, and traumatic life into one of peace and purpose. Now I desire to encourage others to cultivate a deeper and more intimate relationship with Jesus Christ.
Q. Carla, what do you say to that listener who is despairing of hope but doesn’t believe they can find it today?
Carla: In the midst of the turmoil of my youth, God sought me out. I was not aware of it. Nevertheless, He was there and He desired a relationship with me. All of the circumstances I lived out before coming to Him in saving faith directed me into the hands of an all-loving God who turned my hardships into joy.
I’m not unique. What God has done for me He will do for anyone who comes to Him in faith trusting what He said. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Jesus said, “I came that you might have life and life more abundantly.”
Maybe you’re facing difficult circumstances in your life and you don’t know which way to turn. Consider this your call from an old friend.
You’re not here by accident. God knew a thousand years ago that you would be sitting here today.
Maybe your circumstances are ideal, but still you’re empty inside. You just want to believe there’s more to life than what you’re experiencing now. That same all-knowing God who brought me to Him in 1984, knew you would be here today. He wants a relationship with you.
I would like to pray now and if this is your desire, pray with me.
Let’s pray: Dear Heavenly Father, I am a sinner. But I confess to you my sin and ask that you forgive me of my sins. I believe that Jesus died on the cross to pay the penalty of my sin and that I have forgiveness through trust in Him. So Father, Come into my life, forgive me of my sins, and help me live every day for you. Thank you for your grace and mercy. In the name of Jesus I pray. Amen.
Have you prayed this prayer? If not, why not? Let’s begin this New Year (2015) with New Life in Jesus Christ!
Happy New Year to You All!
